Billie Lourd talks 'brutal' loss of Carrie Fisher, 黛比雷诺兹: 'It's really hard for me'

而现在 “美国恐怖故事” 小明星, 29, is speaking candidly about the loss of her superstar relatives in the latest episode of the New Day podcast, 在 Spotify 上流式传输.

“这是残酷的. 这是真的, really brutal, and I still hesitate and stutter because it’s really hard for me,” Lourd said.

The brunette beauty was the only child of Fisher — who was famed for her roles in “星球大战,” “The Blues Brothers” 和 “When Harry Met Sally.Fisher passed away on Dec. 27, 2016, 在...的年龄 60, after spending four days in intensive care.

CARRIE FISHER’S DAUGHTER BILLIE LOURD REVEALS SHE’S WELED A SON; NAME HONORS LATE MOTHER

第二天, Reynolds — Fisher’s mom and the star ofSingin’ In The Rainamong countless other films — 去世了 84 after suffering a stroke.

The dual tragedies suddenly left Lourd without her closest relatives, and she subsequently struggled to adjust to their absence.

Almost five years on, Lourd says she still feels the enormous loss.

I miss my mom every day and my grandma, but really, my mom the most,” 她承认.

The ‘American Horror Story’ starlet, 29, 在新的一天播客的最新一集中坦率地谈论失去她的超级明星亲戚, 在 Spotify 上流式传输.

The ‘American Horror Story’ starlet, 29, 在新的一天播客的最新一集中坦率地谈论失去她的超级明星亲戚, 在 Spotify 上流式传输. (Photo by Barry King/WireImage)

She was the greatest, funniest person ever. She was my best f–king friend ever. There’s no one who will ever be as funny as she is. She was just — she is amazing.

Lourd told the New Day pod that she rarely speaks candidly about her famous mom and grandma for fear of having her remarks misconstrued by the media.

She stated: “Everything I say gets turned into some headline that I didn’t mean.

BILLIE LOURD HONORS MOM CARRIE FISHER WITH COVER OF TOM PETTY’S ‘AMERICAN GIRLIN BIRTHDAY TRIBUTE

The actress then referenced one particular example, 说: “There’s this one [面试] where I said something, and it was like three months after they died. I didn’t know what the f–k I was talking about or who the f–k I was or what was going on. And I said something like, '好, now that they’re gone, I get to just be Billie.'

It sounded like I like wanted them to die, and that is absolutely the opposite of what I wanted. I would do anything to get them back, but it sounded like I was excited to have the ‘Billie Show.'

Lourd also admitted that she actively resisted publicly linking herself to Fisher and Reynolds when they were alive because she wanted to forge her own path as an actress.

Bille Lourd suffered public heartbreak when her mom, Carrie Fisher, and her grandma, 黛比雷诺兹, died within a day of each other back in 2016.

Bille Lourd suffered public heartbreak when her mom, Carrie Fisher, and her grandma, 黛比雷诺兹, died within a day of each other back in 2016. (Photo by Jason LaVeris/FilmMagic )

But she says she now regrets that decision.

We got offered all these random photoshoots and all this weird stuff that happens in my life, but I didn’t want to do them when they were alive because I wanted to make sure that people knew me separately from them,” the star stated.

Now I wish I could run back and do all of those photoshoots and do anything with them, 真。”

Since the death of Fisher and Reynolds, Lourd has become a mom herself. In September of last year, she gave birth to her son, Kingston, with fiancé Austen Rydell.

早在五月, Lourd shared a sweet snap of her and her young son watching her mom in an old “星球大战” 电影.

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