“President Biden marked the end of his first year in office with a two-hour press conference,” co-anchor Colin Jost began, “because that’s how long it took to list everything that’s gone wrong.”
He noted it was actually the longest presidential press conference in history but “as I have been told many times before, just because you went for a long time doesn’t mean you did a good job.”
Co-anchor Michael Che then steered his comedic chops in the direction of moderate Democratic U.S. Sens. Kyrsten Sinema and Joe Manchin, saying that Republicans senators had lined up to shake Sinema’s hand after she voted against changing to filibuster to help pass the Democrats’ voting rights bill.
“Ah, the U.S. Senate, keeping Black folks down with a quiet handshake since 1787,” Che joked as a fake Senate logo with the faux motto appeared next to him.
He then mentioned that progressive Sen. Bernie Sanders had suggested he would support replacing Sinema and Manchin for their support of the filibuster.
“Damn, Bernie! Stabbing your own coworkers in the back? That’s unforgivable!” Che said, joking he would never try to get Jost fired no matter how much better he thought their fellow “SNL” cast member Bowen Yang would be at the job.
Jost, after a little side-eye, went back to one of “SNL”’s favorite targets: former President Trump, explaining that former Trump administration staff members had told the Jan. 6 committee that he would have made the riot worse if he had given an unscripted statement while it was happening.
“I think that’s a pretty sound argument,” Jost agreed with a laugh. “No one has ever been like, ‘You know who would be perfect to deescalate the situation? Donald Trump.” He then envisioned a situation in which Trump is asked to talk a suicidal person out of jumping off a ledge.
“He’d be like, ‘Don’t jump, even though your wife left you like a dog and this would be the perfect way to get back at her.”
Jost also mocked Prince Andrew over the British royal’s link to the Jeffrey Epstein scandal, calling the prince “Britain’s most eligible bachelor” and claiming Andrew had deleted his Twitter account because he realized “that’s not the app with all the dancing teenagers,” referring to TikTok.
Trump targeted earlier too
The show’s cold open also featured new cast member James Austin Johnson doing his spot-on impression of the former commander-in-chief.
Johnson riffed on everything from getting the booster to John Mayer and Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis in a recurring “SNL” segment where he creates a “Wordle.”
“I’d rather be mayor of anything than be Gov. Ron DeSantis,” Johnson said after revealing “Mayer” as the second word in the Wordle and praising the singer for his 2002 hit “Your Body is a Wonderland.”
“I’d beat him so bad if he ran against me,” he said of the Florida governor, “just like I did with Hillary, OK, cause the only Hilary we like is Duff from ‘How I Met Your Father,’” he added, revealing the third word (acronym) of the Wordle to be HIMYF.
“I’d beat [DeSantis] so bad if he ran against me, just like I did with Hillary, OK, cause the only Hilary we like is Duff from ‘How I Met Your Father.'”
Pete Davidson joined the opening sketch as Serbian tennis star Novak Djokovic, who talked about having his visa revoked in Australia because he wasn’t vaccinated as required for visitors to the country. He was forced to leave without getting to play in the Australian Open.
“People love to tear you off your pedestal,” Davidson said in a mock Serbian accent. “Just ’cause you’re really rich or you’re the best at tennis or you go to a charity event with 200 kids even though you’re dripping with COVID.”
Former cast member and “MacGruber” star Will Forte guest-hosted the episode and Måneskin was the musical guest.