'The Five' on Biden getting tough questions about Afghanistan withdrawal

JESSE WATTERS, 폭스 뉴스 호스트: 여보세요, 각자 모두. I’m Jesse Watters along with Dagen McDowell, 제랄도 리베라, Dana Perino and Greg Gutfeld. What are you doing? 이것의 5:00 뉴욕시와 이것은 “파이브.”

The show is turning 10 and we are keeping the celebration going. As you can see, just take a look at what we got going on in the studio today. Later on, don’t miss an epic edition of Dana’s sports corner also. We got carnival games, cotton candy, prizes and a giant elephant that does tricks.

GREG GUTFELD, 폭스 뉴스 호스트: Where?

WATTERS: 잘, maybe not a giant elephant, but there’s a lot of fun coming up later on. 하지만 먼저, a trivia showdown on some ofThe Five’smost memorable moment. So let’s put our “다섯” knowledge to the test. 괜찮아, first question everybody.

GUTFELD: Are they playing at home?

다나 페리 노, 폭스 뉴스 호스트: 예, play at home.

WATTERS: You can play at home.

GERALDO RIVERA, 폭스 뉴스 호스트: So what, we right our answers?

WATTERS: Geraldo, we’ve been over this.

RIVERA: 오, my god. I miss that class.

PERINO: 물론이야 (알아들을 수 없는).

WATTERS: 괜찮아, 최고, what was the first word Greg banned? What was the first word Greg banned?

RIVERA: 오, my god, I know what this one is.

GUTFELD: I know what it is.

WATTERS: 괜찮아, put it up.

PERINO: I’m drawing a blank, blank, blank.

WATTERS: End of the day? Conversation? 고소? Woke? 괜찮아, what is it?

The answer is.

GUTFELD: 모르겠어요.

(비디오 클립 시작)

PERINO: 그것이 무엇인지.

GUTFELD: I started a ban a word

PERINO: 괜찮아.

GUTFELD: — and today it’s apoplectic. I never want to hear that word again. It somehow gained favor in the last month and I’m tired of it.

(비디오 클립 종료)

RIVERA: Apoplectic?

GUTFELD: I never would have gotten that one. Apoplectic, I like that word.

PERINO: I remember when you banned it is what is.


PERINO: And I was so glad. That was a good one.

WATTERS: Looks like all of my talking points out the window.


WATTERS: 괜찮아, number two

RIVERA: Time will tell, ban that one.

WATTERS: How many times has Dana cursed on the air, which is good? This is a good one.

PERINO: 잘, 괜찮아, technicality.

GUTFELD: You can’t

PERINO: If you use something as a verb it’s not really cursing, but okay, 좋아.

WATTERS: 오, let’s just

GUTFELD: I think I could challenge that right now.

WATTERS: 한 번. 괜찮아, and let’s hear.

PERINO: 오, 아니!

(비디오 클립 시작)

UNKNOWN: — pacing people around with a reptile.

UNKNOWN: Oh my god.

UNKNOWN: Even going into the

PERINO: What an (BLEEP).


PERINO: And also as a conservative woman, you just sort of like you know you’re not going to get glow (ph) profile so you just get your (BLEEP) 끝난. 권리.

(비디오 클립 종료)


WATTERS: 잘, that’s it? Just two?

PERINO: Just two? You missed one.

WATTERS: We missed one?

PERINO: I got bleeped for using, 잘, can I say it? B-I-T-C-H-I-N. I said that as a verb and they bleeped me.

WATTERS: That’s not really a curse a word.

GUTFELD: And you (알아들을 수 없는) like you are complaining.

RIVERA: It’s so cute the way you spell it out.

PERINO: 잘, I don’t want to get bleeped again and then next time, on our tenth anniversary we’ll have to add another one.

WATTERS: 괜찮아, number three, what topic was being discussed when I first asked Dana to squeeze my hands? Remember when I squeezed Dana’s hand when I’m treading on thin ice. What topic?

PERINO: 괜찮아.

GUTFELD: 오, geez.

PERINO: 오, boy, I don’t know if this is — 모르겠어요.

RIVERA: That’s a minefield.

GURFELD: That’s every single idea we’ve ever talked about.

WATTERS: 저도 요? Panic? 여성?

맥도웰 데이, 폭스 뉴스 호스트: 숙녀.


WATTERS: 숙녀? What did you say? 여성. 들어 보자. What was it?

(비디오 클립 시작)

WATTERS: I feel like there is a lot of landmines for me in the story so I’m going try something new. I’m going to ask Dana told my hand. 다나, if you feel like I’m saying something inappropriate, you squeeze it, and I will then move on to another issue.

PERINO: 예, 예.

(비디오 클립 종료)

WATTERS: 그래서, was it about sex somehow or women?


GUTFELD: The Peloton ad in which everybody was complaining that she had become some kind of like subservient to her husband because she wanted to look good. It turns out they were way ahead of everything.

PERINO: And that sheand that she didn’t really want to get a Peloton.


PERINO: It was forced upon her.

RIVERA: I remember that.

WATTERS: 괜찮아, next one. Number four, Dagen said she’d rather eat a bushel of what rather than watch Chris Cuomo? Bushel of what?

GUTFELD: 오, I think I know.

WATTERS: The colorful Dagen. A bushel of?

PERINO: 오, wow! 내말은, there are so many possibilities.

맥도웰: There is so many. 나는하지 않는다 —

GUTFELD: I feel like this is

맥도웰: 예, I use that a lot, 그렉. I was going to say

WATTERS: Bull frogs.

맥도웰: — candy corn.

WATTERS: Crab sticks. Geraldo, we’re going to have to bleep you.

맥도웰: 뭐?

WATTERS: 괜찮아, what did Dagen say she’d rather eat a bushel of than watch Chris Cuomo?

(비디오 클립 시작)

맥도웰: I’d rather eat a bushel of cicadas than watch half of one hour of Chris Cuomo.

(비디오 클립 종료)

WATTERS: Cicadas.

맥도웰: Is my brain a sieve. I said that like a few weeks ago.

WATTERS: That was in June. None of us got that right.

맥도웰: Oh my, god.

RIVERA: I needed a briefing on this segment.

WATTERS: 예. Geraldo, you were like

GUTFELD: We were talking about it.

RIVERA: — every other show. 괜찮아, number five, fill in the blank.

Geraldo has called himself America’s blank uncle. America’s blank uncle.


RIVERA: 맞습니다. 맞습니다.

WATTERS: Dirty. Latin. 스토너. Sexy. 오, 행복. 괜찮아, let’s see it.

(비디오 클립 시작)

RIVERA: I think of myself as America’s stoner uncle.

(비디오 클립 종료)

RIVERA: I’m like America’s stoner uncle now.

WATTERS: Who got that? Greg got that?

GUTFELD: 아니, I said dirty.

WATTERS: Geraldo got it. Geraldo is winning with one.

RIVERA: It’s pretty pathetic.

WATTERS: 괜찮아. Very good, Geraldo. Geraldo, you’re not allowed to win.

RIVERA: 괜찮아. 괜찮아.

WATTERS: 괜찮아, number six

RIVERA: I’ll throw it.

WATTERS: — name all of the animals the Columbus Zoo brought onset.

GUTFELD: 오, my god.

PERINO: 괜찮아.

WATTERS: This was last year I believe.

PERINO: 괜찮아, 기다리다, 기다리다, 기다리다.

WATTERS: Before the pandemic. Name all of the animals. 오, I can only name two. Sloth and cat. Like a wildcat.

맥도웰: I guessed.

GUTFELD: 나는 말했다 —

PERINO: I wrote cat wild.

GUTFELD: — bobcat with weird ears.

WATTERS: Bobcat. Can you give me cat? Sloth, kangaroo, penguin — 오, Dana’s got this.

RIVERA: Was there a penguin?

WATTERS: Let’s see it. What do we have here? Columbus Zoo, roll it.

(비디오 클립 시작)


This is a young cat. It’s five months old, Tebow. It’s Canada lynx.

PERINO: I’m going to hold the kangaroo. 괜찮아, this is Zuko.

STALF: And it’s a South African penguin.

(비디오 클립 종료)

PERINO: How I’d think I’d get three.

WATTERS: Dana’s got it.

RIVERA: 괜찮아.

GUTFELD: The age on set (알아들을 수 없는) 쇠퇴.

WATTERS: 그래서, let’s go to the scoreboard. Geraldo, 하나, 다나, 하나. 그렉, you better step it up.

GUTFELD: 처럼, 예, 예, 예.

WATTERS: You’re a vet here. Number seven, what was the first animal video Greg showed forAnimals are Great?”

맥도웰: 오, this is a good one.

PERINO: Just the animal?

WATTERS: Like what kind of animal or describe the video.

PERINO: What do you call those little things? 오, 예, 알아. 알아. 알아.

맥도웰: I’m guessing but I’m reading your mind, 그렉.

GUTFELD: I’m going to go with bush — 오, I was just putting that.

PERINO: It’s his favorite.

WATTERS: 오, I think you guys are right.

GUTFELD: I need one.

WATTERS: 괜찮아. 고양이?

GUTFELD: Cat playing with a laser.

맥도웰: I said a cat playing with a laser.

WATTERS: 괜찮아. Let’s see the tape. What did Greg have for the first one?

(비디오 클립 시작)

GUTFELD: It is time forAnimals are Great.This hamster is great. And you know why? Because he shows you how to inspect a home.

(비디오 클립 종료)

WATTERS: Hamster. You know what that means everybody? We have to go to a tiebreaker. We have a tiebreaker. Should I just read the next one and consider it a tiebreaker?

GUTFELD: Is it tied up? 예.

WATTERS: This is the tiebreaker. Only you guys can answer this question.

GUTFELD: I’ll probably get it right, 그때.


PERINO: Whisper it to me.

WATTERS: 괜찮아. How many episodes of “다섯” are there?

GUTFELD: I’m going to play along anyway.

WATTERS: Whoever scores this wins.

RIVERA: I am going to be close.

WATTERS: 다나, that was fast.

GUTFELD: I’m going to say this. Did you keep that in your journal?

PERINO: 아니, I saw it on a piece of paper the other day.

WATTERS: 괜찮아. What is the answer? Someone tell me what the answer is.


WATTERS: 2,593, I think Dana is the

RIVERA: 아니, she was dyslexic. 아니.

GUTFELD: She had the answer.

PERINO: 아니, 아니, 아니. It was on a piece of paper the other day and I have somewhat of a photographic memory.

RIVERA: 괜찮아.


WATTERS: 다나, the queen of “다섯” trivia.


WATTERS: Well done, 다나 페리 노.

PERINO: 감사합니다. 감사합니다.

WATTERS: There is more of this 10-year anniversary fun of “파이브.” Who’s got the best carnival skills? We’re going to find out later in a specialDana’s Sports Corner.But coming up next, Joe Biden blowing up on the media over his Afghanistan withdrawal plan as the Taliban regains control.

(머시얼 브레이크)

맥도웰: President Biden playing defense as the potential for disaster looms in Afghanistan. The Taliban already gaining momentum as U.S. troop withdrawal is more than 90 percent complete. President Biden addressing his plan earlier and getting nasty when pressed by reporters.

(비디오 클립 시작)

UNKNOWN: Is a Taliban takeover of Afghanistan now inevitable?



BIDEN: Because you have the Afghan troops have 300,000 well-equipped, as well-equipped as any army in the world.

UNKNOWN: 탈레반을 믿습니까?, 경?

BIDEN: Is that a serious question?


BIDEN: 크리스, it’s a silly question. Do I trust the Taliban? 아니, but I trust the capacity of the Afghan military who is better trained, better equipped, and more competent in terms of conducting war.

UNKNOWN: Will the United States be responsible for the loss of Afghan civilian lives that could happen after the military exit?

BIDEN: 아니, 아니, 아니.

(비디오 클립 종료)

맥도웰: 다나, the press corps, they were on the ball (알아들을 수 없는).

PERINO: That’s the toughest weekthat was the toughest questions that he’s had. If you remember Robert Gates who served Bush, 오바마, and when he wrote his book he saidthis is his words not mine — 그 “Joe Biden has been wrong on every foreign policy issue since the ’70s.

And I’m not going to debate whether we should leave Afghanistan. So the decision has been made but you can leave in a way that his dignity and is not so sloppy.

The other thing that is really bothering me is the issue of the Afghan interpreters who sacrificed, works for us, and you have people like Congressman Michael Waltz and Dan Crenshaw who both served and who will say that their interpreters saved their lives.

잘, they are supposed to be able to come here and because the Taliban want to kill them. And so there is a whole bunch (알아들을 수 없는) stuck over there, but this case that’s really bothering me this week is there is a man named Niazy Zalmay. He lives in Iowa. He’s been there since 2014. When he found outhe came for a conference. He found out that the Taliban was going to try to kill him, applied for political asylum.

He’s been living in Iowa. He has a business, he has employees. He’s an exemplary record. He goes in for his interview to finally get his approval to stay, and they said — “국토 보안 부서, have you ever had any interaction with the Taliban?” And he says, “잘, I can’t tell a lie. When I was nine years old the Taliban came to me and said I had to go get them a piece of bread from my mom. So I went to my mom, I got the bread and I gave it to the Taliban and my mom yelled and called them smugglers (알아들을 수 없는).

괜찮아, he was nine years old. The Department of Homeland Security has sent him a letter that saysbecause of your interaction with the Taliban, you are not allowed to stay.And they are going to deport him on this ridiculous technicality.

And the White House is like, 잘, that’s what the law says. And I just think that is extremely hard to believe. I hope somebody is actually telling the president what’s really going on here because somebody needs to get to Secretary Mayorkas and say that should not stand. That is shameful.

맥도웰: And it’s shameful that they don’t have a path to protect the interpreters, Geraldo. 내말은, this seems very haphazard. They move the date up to August 31st now because somebody told the Biden administration “야, 9/11 just looks bad. It looks like a marketing ploy.

RIVERA: A couple of quick points. I think that this was Joe Biden at his finest. You may disagree with him but he was strong, he was committed, he’s doing something that is controversial, but in the best interest and issue of the United States.

We went to Afghanistan to avenge 9/11. We killed Bin Laden. It was graced to be on the air and to break that news to the nation that Bin Laden had been killed by our great SEAL warriors. We should have left then in 2011.

We stayed 10 years too long.

Afghan is a failed state. It’s a narco state. It provides all the heroin that’s consumed in Europe. We had aand once I was with the Marines in Helmand province. They actually camping in poppy fields there. It’s a disgusting, savage place. It’s going to splinter. There was no holding it together.

In terms of ourI have Akbar Shinwari, our dear interpreter, my guy, the guy saved my life. Same thing, 알 잖아, we worked for Sky News at some point. They talk to the Taliban. 알 잖아, you can get them on the telephone. So now, he’s got to straighten all that out before he can get here.

People we know on a first-name basis that risked everything. Having said that, I also want to say, my god, our G.I.’s, our warriors that gave so much, some their lives, 알 잖아, I get pictures during the time when I was the war correspondent. I get pictures from their families. You interviewed airman so-and-so. He died here and there.

그것은, 알 잖아, it’s a horrible experience. We should have learned from the Alexander the Great and the British Empire and the Soviet Union, that you can’t remake a country in our own image. You will never make Afghanistan France. Forget about it. 알 잖아, let’s cut our losses, longest war in history.

맥도웰: 잘, now the story becomes China. China ramping up Afghanistan involvement amid U.S. 철수. Afghanistan is no longer in our national or strategic interest said President Biden today. 오, 정말? Radical Islamic terrorism isn’t because you’ve got the Taliban and Al Qaeda and ISIS.

WATTERS: I think we got a handle on it. And Geraldo is right, Joe Biden was more coherent than I have ever seen him today and that’s just because I could understand what Joe was saying so that’s a low bar and that’s as complementary as I will be of the president.

Genghis Khan also, Geraldo —


WATTERS: — he got bounced out of there too, 그래서, it’s a really bad track record. The terrain is disgusting, caves, mountains, deserts, the export opium, rugs, poverty-stricken. I don’t know how you can fight there. You could spend the next century just gunning down Taliban after — 아프가니스탄에서, place would still be the same.

There is really no difference if you look at Vietnam and Afghanistan. Not winnable wars in the traditional sense. Nixon recognized it. You have the Vietcong hiding underground in tunnels, in jungles assimilating within the population, they jump out at any time and shoot a G.I.

They had to get out and you’re never going to win in the traditional sense.

그래서, the Taliban only force right now in play there, they reconstituted.

That was inevitable. Really the issue is how hard are we going to have to dig and to defend the embassy in Kabul? That’s the big issue.

그러나, thanks to George W. Bush and the succeeding presidents, we have set up such a great counterterror system with satellites and financial tracking systems

RIVERA: Drones.

WATTERS: — interrogation drones, all sorts of technology that we can really disrupt plots, see them as they are coming together. So hopefully we can protect the homeland from here.

맥도웰: Geraldo liked President Biden’s performance today, but that was bumbling and incoherent a lot of times.

RIVERA: So did Jesse.

WATTERS: 잘, I’m just saying better than he has been before.

맥도웰: 권리.

WATTERS: I’m not saying it’s good, it’s just better.

GUTFELD: 모르겠어요, 내말은, 알 잖아, I give him a pass because 20 years is a long time and we have to accept that the world has changed, especially with warfare and technology. We’ve got to get over this idea it is a failure to leave. It is not a failure to leave. It’s acknowledgment that the world has changed.

And maybe this kind of warfare that we were dealing with is almost irrelevant and antiquated especially when you talk about the drones and you talk about the threats that we are seeing with ransomware which we can’t even get a handle on. And we need to concentrate on things like ransomware and bioterror, 드론, 그리고 그런 것들.

The way to look at it is Afghanistan isn’t going anywhere, but thanks to technology, we can go anywhere. And that means that, 알 잖아, we don’t have to be there. We may not have to occupy anyplace anymore to keep us safe. And I think we kind of knew that and I think it’s time.

And people should not think of this is any kind of defeat. It’s just that the world has changed. Terrorism is different. Drones, bioterrorism, it’s all changed. Why are we there? We don’t have to be. So anyway.

맥도웰: I’m just curious to see how China leverages that against us. They want to dominate the world.

RIVERA: I would love to — 중국, take Afghanistan. It’s yours.


GUTFELD: Look what they did to Russia, 내말은, USSR.

RIVERA: 바로 그거죠.

GUTFELD: Every time you jumped in there its

RIVERA: 바로 그거죠.

맥도웰: Final word, 그렉. You all better start warming up, do some deep knee bends because we’re getting close to some fun carnival games and a specialDana’s Sports Corner.That’s later.

다음으로, radical squad member Rashida Tlaib has a new target to defund and it could leave America’s borders even more open.

(머시얼 브레이크)

GUTFELD: Defunding the police isn’t enough, Democrats have new agencies they want to target. Squad member Rashida Tlaib is demanding we gut funding

I said it rightto top immigration agencies even though there is a crisis at the border.

(비디오 클립 시작)

대표. RASHIDA TLAIB (D-MI): We must eliminate funding for CPP, 빙, and their parent organization, DHS. These are agencies are inept to humanely guiding migrants to our immigration system and further continueinstead they further continue to terrorize migrant communities located within our communities.

(비디오 클립 종료)

GUTFELD: 다나, I have a theory.

PERINO: 괜찮아.

GUTFELD: That shethe reason why she i an awful politician, probably the worst politician, is because she hates America and she realizes she can do much better within the system destroying it with her own incompetence.

So she looks at the rising crime wave and she goes less cops, 적게 — fewer cops. Let’s get rid of all of these law enforcement agencies and let’s all let it go to hell because I’m just an incompetent politician. She actually, deliberately destroying the country, my theory.

PERINO: Good theory.

GUTFELD: 감사합니다.

PERINO: You know who is hardest hit today?


PERINO: All the Democrats who said it was Republicans that were trying to defund the police.


RIVERA: They got pinocchioed.

PERINO: (Inaudible). They didn’t get the memo. If you look at what the border patrol has actually done, how much humanitarian work they have done where the cartels are doing nothing but trying to destroy them. I got these talking points from Jesse this morning when he was on newsroom, but it was a really good point.

GUTFELD: You got his talking points? That’s never happened.

WATTERS: I’ll allow it.

GUTFELD: It’s usually the reverse.

PERINO: But they are doing all of these great things. 그리고 분명히, I’m not saying that they are 100 percent perfect, but it is so much better than the idea of just basically saying, 알 잖아, open borders.

GUTFELD: 제시, we have full-scale crime wave and you have a party and a media in denial. If the Republicans don’t sweep the elections like justice- fueled Zamboni, I’m going to turn to a life of crime and I invite you to join me.

WATTERS: Did you write justice-fueled Zamboni down?


WATTERS: 괜찮아. I just want everybody to know that. 괜찮아, that’s good. You made a point earlier about that she wants to do this because this is purposeful.


WATTERS: That’s not an opinion, that’s fact and here’s why. If you follow the logic, when we defunded the police, crime went up. So if you defund the border patrol, illegal immigration goes up. Thusly, she must know two plus two equals four. She must know saying I want to increase illegal immigration.

It is almost refreshing, 그렉, because most Dems dance around that. They squirm. She is actually admitting she wants to open the borders. So in a way, it’s better than debating someone that tries to hide that. Dana is right, my point, 아름다운, I made it on her show. If you look at the video that we’re showing, you can’t deny this. This is a fact. You have U.S.

border patrol agents literally helping migrants cross the river. They’re rescuing them from drowning. They’re putting diapers on children. They’re feeding them. They’re giving them blankets. They’re giving them shelter.

What are the cartels doing? They’re shaking them down for cash. They’re sex trafficking them. 내말은, 맙소사, they’re raping them.

PERINO: Putting them in stash houses.

WATTERS: They’re putting them in stash houses, and then they’re using them as drug mules once they come across, and then extorting them afterwards.

그래서, to say that we’re terrorizing? We’re rescuing these migrants from the hands of the cartels.

GUTFELD: 그리고 물론, anybody on the people on the other side would accuse you of being histhat hysteria, just like the crime wave. It’s all some kind of hysteria, Geraldo, that none of this is really happening.

RIVERA: 잘, first of all about the squad, I appreciate their enthusiasm and their passion, even though sometimes they get dopey.


RIVERA: Rashida Tlaib’s problem here was conflating the Border Patrol and Immigration and Customs Enforcement. 빙, even within the agency itself is a movement to reform it. 왜? Because here isor these great cops that are trained and skilled and could be busting Mexican drug cartels, and who do they go after very often they pick, the low hanging fruit. It’s the dishwasher and the lawnmower and the babysitter, and the farmworker.

WATTERS: I don’t know if that’s true, Geraldo. I don’t think that’s true.

RIVERA: It’s Juan and Maria, that’s who they’re going after.

WATTERS: 아니, because if you look at the list of the top 10 ICE suspects, it’s rapists, it’s murderers, it’s hardcore traffickers. It’s not dishwashers, Geraldo.

RIVERA: Where do you think they getwhy do you think they terrorize these immigrant communities? Because they take people on buses, they stop people that are waiting on corners, they go into the kitchens of restaurants. They should bethey should be going after mobsters and killers and then drug cartels, not Juan and Maria.

WATTERS: 잘, 그들이하다.

GUTFELD: I’m sure they agree with you on that.

WATTERS: And the dishwashers are not a priority.

GUTFELD: What do you say, 새벽에?

맥도웰: That may be Rashida Tlaib doesn’t even know what these agencies do, that she lumped them all together. Because clearly what the Border Patrol is doing, if she ever looked on YouTube even, she could watch some videos of little children of like infants being rescued by our Border Patrol, 영웅, overworked, 압도 된, and ignored largely, rescuing children who were put in harm’s way by cartel members and criminals who are emboldened Biden and company’s policies.

I guess she rolled out of bed this morning and her feet hit the floor and she said I am not a lunatic enough. I justI need to plumb new depths of loathsomeness to say this because talking about we need to end policing, 오, and incarceration, that wasn’t stupid enough.

WATTERS: Did Peter Doocy take my hand and ask Psaki that question because I telegraphed it on your show, 베드로.

PERINO: I didn’t see that today. I didn’t see that today.

WATTERS: He needs to ask that question.

WATTERS: 괜찮아, 다가오는, disgraced lawyer Michael Avenatti is headed to prison and was weeping in court like Brian Stelter at CNN.

(머시얼 브레이크)

RIVERA: I don’t like to kick a guy when he’s down but this is a truly loathsome creature. Former media darling Michael Avenatti heading to prison. The disgraced lawyer will spend two and a half years behind bars for trying to extort Nike for $ 25 백만, who is apparently weeping in the courtroom today. And his legal troubles far from over. Avenatti faces two more trials on the west coast. The media looking very foolish after praising this creep.

(비디오 클립 시작)

미확인 여성: 나에게, you’re like the Holy Spirit. You are all places at all times.

BRIAN STELTER, CHIEF MEDIA CORRESPONDENT, CNN: Looking at the 20200, one reason why I’m taking you seriously as a contender is because of your presence on cable news.

I wrote about this saying, you’re currently leading the pack among 2020 contenders on the Democratic side.

CHRIS MATTHEWS, MSNBC 호스트: 보기, I think you’re doing a hell of a job. I don’t think you’re in this for money.

(비디오 클립 종료)

RIVERA: We used to share an office, Chris and I, at CNBC. 그래서, 다나, 이것은

that affection they showed Avenatti, was that Avenatti qualities or was that really about hating Trump?

PERINO: I think that it was just like getting carried away with themselves, like in the hopes that maybe somebody will be able to take on Donald Trump at the time. And Michael Avenatti, he craved the media attention. He gets

he was always available. 내말은, it’s the easiest date in town. And the thing is also he was quite behind the times.

What you do now if you want to get $ 25 million dollars from a company is you have basically you go underground and ask them for 20 — 알 잖아, $ 50 million in crypto, and that’s how you get paid like this. Like he doesn’t even know what he’s doing anymore.

GUTFELD: 아니, you become a diversity consultant. And you introduceand you come in and wokefy the corporation.

PERINO: You could do that as well. But I’m glad that justice was done here.

And I’m really glad also that Nike’s lawyers sniff this out immediately, contacted the FBI.

RIVERA: The guy is driving Ferraris, he’s wearing a $ 2,000 suits and he’s

where’s the money coming from? 그래서, what about stormy Daniels? Do you thinks she shouldis it worthDaniels, Daniels, Stormy Daniels.

GUTFELD: 예. I like how you should rememberhow you forget her name.

How can you forget Stormy? 그는 있어요 30 개월. That’s one month for every hair on his head. I’m curious will Brian Stelter or Jeff Zucker visit him in jail. 아무튼, they were — 알 잖아 —

WATTERS: Counselor’s visit.

PERINO: 제시와 터스.

GUTFELD: 제시와 터스, oh my God.

WATTERS: Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

GUTFELD: But how does CNN report this? 내말은, it’s like Michael Avenatti, a lawyer we just heard about today, we did not party with him, there no pictures of us with Don Lemon in the Hamptons, he just went to jail and we are so happy that he went to jail, and we have nothing to do with him.

How else are they going to report on it? Because they push this guy on America because to your question to Dana, they were diluted by their — 잘, their delusional loathing of Donald Trump. They just hateif this guy was like a mass murder and they still would have

RIVERA: But there’s very clear evidence of that, 아닌가, 제시? 알 잖아, you can speak about media bias and all the rest of it. But when you see it laid bare like this, here’s a guy that was embraced in a way that was really obscene. It was so gushy. 마이클 아베나티, 마이클 아베나티, and then it turns out he’s just, 알 잖아, just a lowlife.

WATTERS: You have street smarts. This table has street smarts. We could smell his cheap cologne from a mile away. We saw it coming. But they don’t have street smarts over in these mainstream media hallways. They get duped.

Remember Smollett?


WATTERS: 스몰렛, 오, 예, I’m hungry for a Subway sandwich at 40 이하.

어서, 남자. And they believe the guy a week later. And then this guy is little shady legal maneuvers, pulling fake victims out of his hat to destroy Kavanaugh. He was sucking up to everybody, all this grandiosity.

They got suckered into this guy. They hitched a wagon to a criminal carnival barker because they loath Trump and they thought this was going to be the silver bullet.

And when I noticed that guy was almost on TV as much as Fauci, when you see people on TV that much asmuch as Fauci, and as much as of Avenatti, there’s always a big, big crash. Kilmeade better be careful.

GUTFELD: 잘, unless you’re selling a book.

WATTERS: Unless you’re selling the book.

맥도웰: I don’t care about Stormy. I’m glad this guy’s going to jail. You know why they can’t smell out this guy, 이, 알 잖아, a steaming bag of skeeve that you can

WATTERS: A bag of cicadas?

맥도웰: 권리. They can’t sniff him out because they are him.


맥도웰: They are the combination

RIVERA: 오, 어서.

맥도웰: 예. They’re dip-witted and arrogant. 뭐 — how else do you explain this idiot goes to Nike, he’s like, I’m going to outsmart the lawyers at Nike. They’re all the same. It’s a party of one.

RIVERA: Stay tuned. We are celebrating our 10th anniversary with a special edition of Dana’s sports corner. 그래서, let’s start getting suited up. 녀석, 이것 좀봐. We’re ready.

WATTERS: Those looks like a cowboy jerseys.

GUTFELD: Those are fun.

WATTERS: You can’t put those on.

HARRIS FAULKNER, 폭스 뉴스 호스트: Happy birthday to everybody on THE FIVE.

Wait a minute. Did you say 10 연령? 아니, 아니, 아니, they’re a lot older than 10. 오, the show, congratulations. Looking forward to the next decade and beyond for THE FIVE not you individually, but like the show is 10. I get it.

MARTHA MACCALLUM, 폭스 뉴스 앵커: A big Happy Birthday to THE FIVE. Thanks for letting me stop by every once in a while. You guys have a great legacy.

Keep it going. Congratulations.

(머시얼 브레이크)

PERINO: 괜찮아, I’ve been waiting for this all day. It’s time for a special edition of Dana’s Sports Corner which I stole from Greg a few years ago. 그래서, we have carnival games here from fantasy world entertainment.

감사, you guys, for setting all this up. Jesse and I are going to square off on this basketball, pop a shot and I think I might win.

Dagen and Jesse and I, we’re going towe’re going to do this thing over here and then we’re going to come overwhat’s it called? The thingthe thing that you hit with the thing.

맥도웰: 예, the hammer.

PERINO: The hammer. And then we’re going to come over here and do a balloon blast with Greg because there’s four of us. We’re going to write hit these things.

GUTFELD: 알 잖아, when I head fantasy world entertainment, I was expecting something totally different.

PERINO: What are you holding? 괜찮아, 괜찮은 —

WATTERS: Put that thing somewhere else.

PERINO: 그리고 또한 — we also have Billy from Asbury Park Cotton Candy.

RIVERA: Yum, yum, yum.

PERINO: And Geraldo is going to help us out. We’re going to snack on that.

We’re going to feed the crew and our producers who are amazing and have done so much to set this up. 제시, are you ready

WATTERS: I’m ready.

PERINO: — to get schooled in the art of basketball?

WATTERS: Here we go.

PERINO: Ready, 하나, 두, three, go. 오, 사격. I made a basket for me.

GUTFELD: Anybody keeping score?

PERINO: My mom is going to be so impressed. Is everybody counting?

RIVERA: She’s kicking your butt, dude.

WATTERS: Did I win?

PERINO: Is that it? Who won?

맥도웰: Jesse won.


WATTERS: 죄송합니다, 다나.

PERINO: Recount.

WATTERS: Recount.

PERINO: There’s no way. I think I did win. 엄마, believe me. 난 최선을 다 했어.

WATTERS: I’m a little bit longer.

GUTFELD: I think we should have an audit.

PERINO: 확인, apparently Dagen thinks she knows how to do the striker. She had tips or something.

맥도웰: Brian Dempsey

GUTFELD: I don’t press the machines.

맥도웰: — my stageour stage manager showing how to do it beforehand.

PERINO: 괜찮아.

맥도웰: 그래서, you putyou have to hit it here, so you

PERINO: 잘, let’s just see it.

맥도웰: 아니, but you

PERINO: Don’t tell Jesse how to do it.



PERINO: Try again one more time.

WATTERS: You want another one?

맥도웰: 예. I’ve got heels on. You have to wear heels, 제시.

WATTERS: Do I have to wear heels?

맥도웰: 예.

PERINO: 확인, 확인, now let’s

맥도웰: 내말은, you’re supposed to — 아니, but I hit it here, and you have to hit it here. You go.

WATTERS: 괜찮아, let me try this.

PERINO: That’s a little harder than I thought.

WATTERS: 괜찮아, ready? Let me get right here.

PERINO: Make Jesse Jr. 교만한.


PERINO: Are you going to get this one for Jesse Jr.

WATTERS: 예. give me the price.

PERINO: I thought I was going to win this. I do actually think I won the basketball. 확인, 기다리다.

WATTERS: Can you even hold that up? Do you need help?

PERINO: This is kind of heavy.

GUTFELD: The peloton has not helped you with the arm area.

WATTERS: You skipped arm

맥도웰: You hit it better than I did.

PERINO: One more time?

맥도웰: 예.

WATTERS: Harder, 다나.

PERINO: That was hard.

WATTERS: Six. I’ll hold on to this.

PERINO: You win and you getyou get to choose one of these lovely toys from Fantasy World Entertainment for your little one.

WATTERS: 확인. Thank you Fantasy World.

PERINO: 확인, 지금 —

GUTFELD: Jasper would have just eaten that. 괜찮아, this is called balloon blast. You know how this works. Just aim them at the mouth of the clown. How many times have I said that? 내가 맞습니까?? I’ve had some great times after the carnival closes.

PERINO: 괜찮아, 확인, ready?


RIVERA: White is leading. White is leading. Here comes blue. Here comes blue. 아니, it’s white. It’s white. 아니, it’s blue. Blue wins.

GUTFELD: I ran out of water.

PERINO: (알아들을 수 없는)


PERINO: 오, it stops when she wins.

RIVERA: Well done, 새벽에.


RIVERA: 괜찮아, 지금, it’s time for

GUTFELD: You know what I need? I need to Beta Prostate.

RIVERA: 확인, cotton candy.


RIVERA: 어서, Billy is spinning. Billy is spinning.

PERINO: Asbury Park Cotton Candy. What’s the secret though to your great candy? Yours is a little different than everybody else.

미확인 여성: 그래서, it’s organic cotton candy. We don’t use any artificial flavors. We don’t use any food coloring. So you’ll see that it’s mostly you know, 하얀. It’s not the blue and the pink that everyone’s used to but it’s just all-natural and delicious.

PERINO: And it hasyou have different flavors.

미확인 여성: I have different flavors. I brought some today. But our most popular is our sea salt chocolate caramel. Geraldo is was going to help me here.

RIVERA: 확인. I got it. I got it.

미확인 여성: It’s chocolate caramel cotton candy and some

RIVERA: Can I eat it or

GUTFELD: It looks like Geraldo’s hair.

RIVERA: Look at that, my mustache.

미확인 여성: — with some black (알아들을 수 없는). You turn while I do this.


미확인 여성: Just a little bit of salt.

PERINO: 오, 괜찮은.

RIVERA: 그게 다야?

미확인 여성: Would you like one? Anybody?

PERINO: 새벽에?

맥도웰: I want some.

WATTERS: I’ll take it.

GUTFELD: I’ll have to watch my girlish figure.

RIVERA: 오, it melts in your mouth. It’s very good.

미확인 여성: 괜찮아, who’s next? Who’s next?

PERINO: Dagen is going to be next.

GUTFELD: What hasn’t, Geraldo?

PERINO: Where canwhere can people find you, Ashbury Park?

미확인 여성: 그래서, we are in a few shops in Ashbury Park. We’re in a candy store River Street Sweets.

PERINO: Awesome.

미확인 여성: (알아들을 수 없는) which is like the main drive. And then they can find us online 24/7. All of our sizes, all of our flavors

PERINO: Did all the tourist come back?

WATTERS: 오, just dig right in, 새벽에.


미확인 여성: Are you sure you don’t want salt?

PERINO: She’s good.

RIVERA: You haven’t Bruce Springsteen?

미확인 여성: I haven’t. I miss him every time he goes.

PERINO: In the commercial break, we’re going to do a recount of the basketball because I really do think I won.

RIVERA: I do too.

PERINO: I won. Geraldo is with me on this. Favorite segment, “ONE MORE THINGis up next.

(머시얼 브레이크)

WATTERS: It is time forONE MORE THING.” 그렉 구트 펠드.

GUTFELD: Let’s do this, my favorites.

WATTERS: You look ridiculous.

GUTFELD: Do I? Maybe I shouldn’t wear this. 너무 늦었다. I was out in LA recently and the celebrities are everywhere always bothering me. I was out by the beach, Malibu, and who did I see driving around town but the lovely Paris Hilton in her little pink Jeep driving around. 그녀는 — 알 잖아, she still looks great at the age of 57. Its amazing that she’s been around for that long.

WATTERS: 알 잖아, Geraldo had a house in Malibu?


WATTERS: We learned about that yesterday.

RIVERA: I was at a party with Paris Hilton.

GUTFELD: 물론이야, you did.

WATTERS: 물론이야, you were, Geraldo.

WATTERS: 확인, so we got to get my book to number one. 지금, Reese Witherspoon’s book club recommendation is beating me and I’m not happy about it. Nothing against Reese. We have no beef with Reese. But go to Amazon and get the book to put me there at the top spot.

I’m going to be appearing in person in Tampa for Turning Points Summit on July 19. I’m doing a little book signing there. I’m also at the Nixon library in Yorba Linda, 캘리포니아 — fun word to say Yorba Linda — 칠월 26. 그래서, go to the website and get tickets. And also Manasquan New Jersey on August 1st. That was Dan his recommendation. Go to book town. I’m going to be doing a book signing. I’ll even maybe take a picture with you.

GUTFELD: Don’t do that.

WATTERS: 그래서, go and buy the book How I Saved the World. You may have heard of it. And make me a very happy rich person.



PERINO: 잘, happy birthday eve to you.

WATTERS: 감사합니다.

RIVERA: 진짜? 생일 축하 해요.

WATTERS: I thought it was my birthday today. I got that confused.


PERINO: (알아들을 수 없는)

WATTERS: 예, that’s what it was.

PERINO: Just to plug Jesse’s book one more time on. My podcast Everything Will Be Okay, I did it with Jesse Watters, how he saved my podcast. 그래서, that’s out today. You can check it out. It’s pretty fun conversation. And take a look at this polar bear having fun in a bucket of ice. And I just chose this because this is pretty cute.

WATTERS: That is cute.

GUTFELD: 그런데, you two are on my show tonight.

PERINO: 알아 (알아들을 수 없는)

GUTFELD: 예, Jesse and Dana are on tonight. We’re doing a special episode ofTHE GUTFELD!” on THE FIVE.

WATTERS: I’m excited about it.

PERINO: Exclamation point.

RIVERA: I don’t think there’s enough cross-promotion on it.

PERINO: 잘, Geraldo, you (알아들을 수 없는)

WATTERS: You of all people.

GUTFELD: You do Geraldo promotion.

RIVERA: I invented it.

WATTERS: It’s like you complaining about mustaches.

RIVERA: 괜찮아, 괜찮은. 그래서, I’m reading a great new book. It’s a Private I book, a Harlem Private I named Walter Morris. It’s actually the second in the series. The Men from Ice House Four. It’s like a Chinatown pulp fiction, Dick Tracy. And the best part is that it’s written by Dion Baia. Dion Baia is our soundman right there. You may know him from, 알 잖아, Neil Cavuto show. He makes a frequent cameo appearances. But it’s a terrific read. 알 잖아, very noir.


RIVERA: 알 잖아, 대단히 —

PERINO: 그게 무슨 뜻이야?

RIVERA: Very, very dark.

맥도웰: That’s the way a redneck says nor.

RIVERA: I don’t think rednecks are into noir.

WATTERS: It’s a Spanish pronunciation, 경.

RIVERA: 좋아요.

WATTERS: 괜찮아, Geraldo, you’re finished. 새벽에.

RIVERA: I’m done.

맥도웰: All I gotI got a minute to show you this kid pushing a puppy in a stroller in the grocery store. 됐어요. Little girl pushing her Yorkshire Terrier. I just want to say dogs aren’t allowed in the grocery store. I don’t know who let this kid in with the dog. But I think the dogs cuter than she is.

GUTFELD: 오, that’s terrible.

RIVERA: It is terrible.

맥도웰: 아니에요, 사실은.

GUTFELD: But you’re right here.

WATTERS: Is she getting beer? That’s not beer.

PERINO: 야, 제시, 뭐 — how are you going to close out this week tomorrow?

WATTERS: 그래서, we do have some special guests perhaps. Is it John Rich who’s going to be joining us tomorrow?

GUTFELD: We also have a specialFAN MAIL.

WATTERS: And a specialFAN MAIL,” my favorite segment.

PERINO: It’s Frenchi and Firecracker

WATTERS: Frenchi and Firecracker going to be weighing in? I guarantee.

RIVERA: Did I ever tell you this? John Rich came to my house and we had a barbecue? 사실이야. It’s true story.

WATTERS: Paris Hilton was there too.

맥도웰: And the Eagles.

WATTERS: We’re not going to tell any more of that story though.

PERINO: It was very noir.

WATTERS: That is it for us. “SPECIAL REPORTis up next with Shannon Bream, the Evil Shannon Bream.


PERINO: 야, Shannon Bream.

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