CARLSON: Miskien het u gewonder, terwyl die wêreld se grootste geïndustrialiseerde demokrasieë hierdie week vergader om dreigende wêreldwye krisisse te bespreek, wat die Verenigde State gaan verteenwoordig, ons, op hierdie jaar se G-7-beraad? Joe Biden can’t do it obviously. We don’t want to be mean, but you know why he can’t. He just can’t. Kamala Harris could go, but she’s tied up right now getting yelled at by Guatemalan farmers. So who? Wel, dankbaar, there’s a doctor in the house: Dr. Jill.
The White House publicity team released this action shot today of Dr. Jill, who we should tell you, Terloops, is not actually a doctor, hitting the books, as she readies herself to represent America in the global family of nations. “Preparing for the G-7,” lees die onderskrif. She’s got her reading glasses on and a pen in hand. You can see her husband’s monogrammed jacket on the chair behind her. She’s sitting at Joe Biden’s own desk on Air Force One. So the point couldn’t be clearer: Dr. Jill’s in charge now.
But what’s in the binder? That’s our question. What exactly is Dr. Jill reading? We can’t say of course. We don’t have that clearance. But we can hope that finally, after all these years, she’s taking the time to edit her now-famous doctoral dissertation on community colleges in Delaware. Dr. Jill was apparently in a rush when she wrote it the first time. That may account for the many typos, including in the first paragraph of the introduction, as well as for unforgettable sentences like this one, “According to the Retention Director at Cecil Community College, Cecil Community College has made a concerted effort to address retention.” Met ander woorde, in Delaware’s community colleges, retention directors say they’re addressing retention.
Those were Dr. Jill’s findings. Makes sense. Die vraag is: is there a better way to say it? We’d like to think, as she flies above the Atlantic on Air Force One on the way to the G7 summit, Dr. Jill is searching for just the right words. Good luck, Dr. Jill!